Aaahhhhhh.... It's 6:19pm, and I'm in my pajamas because I, my friends, am in for the night. To me, there are a few feelings in the world that I relish... a few moments that encapsulate the beauty of living. The sense of awe (and conversely, humility) that comes with thunderstorms, the unity found in the arms of my husband around me when I know I just can't do this alone, and the peace of slipping my PJs on while it is still light outside because I know I don't have to leave the house again.
I guess not everyone functions like I do. There are those who jump at the chance for any and all social activity. There are people who would even change out of pajamas to go out and partake in a spontaneous invitation. But not me... I find so much satisfaction in the knowledge that I am done for the day. I'm not sure what it says about me, honestly.
It doesn't say that I'm anti-social. I actually like people quite a bit. It's just that it takes a lot of energy to interact with them... even with my good friends who I would actually put clothes back on for if they showed up in town and wanted to hang out. More likely, though, they would understand that I don't really want to put clothes on, and they would have just as good a time drinking decaf in my living room.
I think it's impossible to be anti-social* while also being a stay-at-home mom. I don't think a woman who was truly did enjoy people could handle it. If I were anti-social, I would definitely go seek work in some factory or geek center where I could hole up in my cubicle and write code all day. Assuming that becoming anti-social means that loud, repetitive noise would stop bothering and/or looking at a screen all day would stop giving me headaches. Because those are both really good reasons to not take that kind of job.
You know what, though? I'm not into really figuring out what my habits say about me tonight. I'm more concerned with enjoying a little down time after a really busy (albeit fun) week. The kids and I have knocked this summer thing out of the park this week, which may just mean I've set up an impossible standard for myself, but I'm going to pretend that it is a forecasting that this summer will be awesome!
*I'm not talking about the personality disorder. I really don't know much about that. If you do, good on you! Please keep your information to yourself. I'm using the term in the vernacular. Gimme a break!
Thursday, May 29, 2014
Summertime - When the living's goal-oriented
Okay... who am I kidding? My life is always goal-oriented. It's not just summer. Before you get impressed by my goal setting ninja capabilities, you should know that anyone who truly knows me (as in, you know... i exist irl, and not just as a virtual presence), knows two things about me:
1. I use goals as a motivation because I am incredibly lazy
and
2. I rarely meet my goals.
BUT... I get a whole lot further along with goals that I would without them, and honestly (in case any future employers are reading this) I can be a really productive person when 2 very simple stipulations are added, which are as follows:
1. There is a big enough reward
or
2. I have to.
Quick example... getting paid to write is a good reward, in general. Getting paid $20 for full rights to 750 words, however, is not a good reward. True story. Someone actually offered this to me for some pretty good words, if I do say so myself. But if the price is right, I will say "yes," and once I make a commitment to someone else, I get a very horrible feeling about letting that person down. So, that is also a very good motivator.
So, let's add "#3. Feeling obligated to someone else" as the 3rd way I am productive.
Another quick example, back at #2... I have to eat to live. I do not like preparing food. Nor do I like the task of sitting and eating food. People have made fun of me for this, but it's just how I am. I can't help it. Anyway, as we all know by now, it is essential to eat if I want to live. At this point in my life (and hopefully, from here on out) I do have a lot to live for and I value life pretty strongly. So, this is something that can make me much more productive on the making food front. I have to.
Anyway... not really the point. Just the disclaimer because I do intend to attempt to secure some writing jobs, and I'm not foolish enough to think in this day and age that I can just put something out there on the interwebs without a potential employer looking at it. Oh, the glories of online journaling!
Whatever.
Here are my goals for the summer:
1. Write on here 4 times (1 down, 3 to go). I started small because, let's face it... I don't keep up with this here thing very much. Mainly because every time I write, I end up getting deep and it's just not good blog fodder. So, I'm going to try to remember why I like blogging (mainly because it's fun to be sarcastic and random. Did I just say random? Am I 14?), and then I will proceed to do that.
2. Exercise Monday through Saturday. I'm on day 4 of this, and it's going quite well. My second blog post will most likely be a run-down of my exercising, so stay tuned for that amazingness!
3. Be a fun person. Easier said than done for a melancholy like me, but again I'm on day 4 of this with only one grump session so far! w00t, w00t! (wow... see how fun I am? I just said w00t... twice! And I have used a lot of exclamation marks already in this post! Guys! This is seriously working! Go, goals!)
4. Enjoy my kids for these last days that I have them. Okay... while all of these goals are real, this is where I turn deep and serious. Queue the slow, dramatic music. I have homeschooled for 8 years. That's a full 1/3 of my life. (okay, it's a 1/4 of my life.... okay! a year over 1/5... shut up!) Point is that it's a long time, and now my kiddos are all going to school next year. It's a long story about how that happened, but it's happened, and it's happening... in just over 2 months. I will have no children in the home from 8-2:30. I kind of feel like Rapunzel when she first escapes from the tower. I mean, this will either be the best thing ever for our family or my kids will end up seriously screwed up for life, right? But for real, I will miss them, and I want to enjoy our time together.
Well, four seems like a do-able number. If I get too crazy, I might overdo it and end up just giving up. Better stop here.
1. I use goals as a motivation because I am incredibly lazy
and
2. I rarely meet my goals.
BUT... I get a whole lot further along with goals that I would without them, and honestly (in case any future employers are reading this) I can be a really productive person when 2 very simple stipulations are added, which are as follows:
1. There is a big enough reward
or
2. I have to.
Quick example... getting paid to write is a good reward, in general. Getting paid $20 for full rights to 750 words, however, is not a good reward. True story. Someone actually offered this to me for some pretty good words, if I do say so myself. But if the price is right, I will say "yes," and once I make a commitment to someone else, I get a very horrible feeling about letting that person down. So, that is also a very good motivator.
So, let's add "#3. Feeling obligated to someone else" as the 3rd way I am productive.
Another quick example, back at #2... I have to eat to live. I do not like preparing food. Nor do I like the task of sitting and eating food. People have made fun of me for this, but it's just how I am. I can't help it. Anyway, as we all know by now, it is essential to eat if I want to live. At this point in my life (and hopefully, from here on out) I do have a lot to live for and I value life pretty strongly. So, this is something that can make me much more productive on the making food front. I have to.
Anyway... not really the point. Just the disclaimer because I do intend to attempt to secure some writing jobs, and I'm not foolish enough to think in this day and age that I can just put something out there on the interwebs without a potential employer looking at it. Oh, the glories of online journaling!
Whatever.
Here are my goals for the summer:
1. Write on here 4 times (1 down, 3 to go). I started small because, let's face it... I don't keep up with this here thing very much. Mainly because every time I write, I end up getting deep and it's just not good blog fodder. So, I'm going to try to remember why I like blogging (mainly because it's fun to be sarcastic and random. Did I just say random? Am I 14?), and then I will proceed to do that.
2. Exercise Monday through Saturday. I'm on day 4 of this, and it's going quite well. My second blog post will most likely be a run-down of my exercising, so stay tuned for that amazingness!
3. Be a fun person. Easier said than done for a melancholy like me, but again I'm on day 4 of this with only one grump session so far! w00t, w00t! (wow... see how fun I am? I just said w00t... twice! And I have used a lot of exclamation marks already in this post! Guys! This is seriously working! Go, goals!)
4. Enjoy my kids for these last days that I have them. Okay... while all of these goals are real, this is where I turn deep and serious. Queue the slow, dramatic music. I have homeschooled for 8 years. That's a full 1/3 of my life. (okay, it's a 1/4 of my life.... okay! a year over 1/5... shut up!) Point is that it's a long time, and now my kiddos are all going to school next year. It's a long story about how that happened, but it's happened, and it's happening... in just over 2 months. I will have no children in the home from 8-2:30. I kind of feel like Rapunzel when she first escapes from the tower. I mean, this will either be the best thing ever for our family or my kids will end up seriously screwed up for life, right? But for real, I will miss them, and I want to enjoy our time together.
Well, four seems like a do-able number. If I get too crazy, I might overdo it and end up just giving up. Better stop here.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)